Monday, November 29, 2010
Sean Fitzpatrick qualifies for Free Cheese
Disgraced former Anglo Irish supremo Sean "regulation sucks" Fitzpatrick has ironically qualified for Irish Government Cheese support. Fitzpatrick who told a court hearing last month that he now lives on one hundred and eighty eight euros per month qualifies for the maximum cheese handout, a two kilo block per month or one hundred and twenty easi singles.
Mr Fitzpatrick is said to be delighted with his calcium rich windfall. Popular Charity worker Sister Clitorata of the "Sisters are doing it for Themselves order" welcomed the news. "It is God's will that Mr Fitzpatrick receives the charity that he is entitled to". Her colleague Sister Vulvana was in less charitable mood " that sneering little prick, I'd like to see him rodgered by a gorilla on steroids".
Mr Fitzpatrick will receive his first cheese handout this week.