Dublin Nov 27th- Condom mania has broken out in Ireland after former Nazi Youth and Pope Benny Ratzinger has told his flock "knock yourselves out and start using Johnnies". In his ubi et scooby address he told Catholics that condoms are cool now and all that shit about loving relationships was a pile of cockology. Irish Catholics flocked to the pharmacies over the last few days to buy sheaths. Convicted Paedophile Priest Father Roger De Young expressed outrage from his prison cell saying "Benny has lost touch, this is the biggest U Turn since Fish for Friday was relaxed".
Devout Catholic and father of ninteen Billy "rhythm method" Devine was delighted " The Mrs will no longer have to say the rosary while we are having relations, she can lie back and let me enjoy meself".